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New Zealand winter meditations

the perfect balance...

overcast 16 °C


As tends to happen with me, a long period of introspection is always followed by an intense phase of action and doing. I don't know quite how it happened that the day before yesterday I found myself running through a park, shouting inspiring things, doing press ups and jumping on and off benches in a smiley face t-shirt but there you go. Welcome to boot camp... I've rediscovered my love for exercise in a big big way and its so beautiful to feel energetic again. The only thing is, as I have to do a lot of fitness stuff for my course (if you're learning to be a personal trainer you have to practice what you preach) I have had to cut down on my Yoga asana practice which I am not that happy about. Ashtanga practice is pretty intense and mixing it with two hours of jogging/weights etc in one day doesn't work. I know, because I've done it in the past, when I was younger and crazier than I am now and it leaves you a little overstimulated. Then your body sort of starts to 'eat itself'. So I've been concentrating on good quality practice twice a week while I do the course and that seems to be ok.

I went to see the healer lady again last weekend and spent two hours meditating. Meditation's something I have neglected in the past, as keeping still is not one of my strong points. Here, now though, it seems to work. Its strange, maybe somethings shifted with all the practice I have been doing, day in, day out over the past few years. When I tried to meditate to a level that I could not get to two or three years ago it just seemed to happen, as if by magic. Stepping away from the thoughts and managing to stay in that suspension. Its almost like when you have a lucid dream- the struggle to stay in it, and control it, without waking up in the process. She advised me to meditate daily, not for hours, maybe 20-30 minutes. I meditate on energy flowing through me, on the chakras. You can keep everything flowing with your mind. I meditate on energy moving though my centres and leaving my body, reaching up into the universe, into the stars, and then, as if it goes through a giant cosmic dialysis machine, coming back down through me like silvery stardust. That was the image that came to mind and if you go through it a few times you feel cleansed, clean, cold, pure. And then you realize that even though Yoga is technically divided into steps, the stages can overlap each other. And the effort to follow the Yamas and Niyamas also help to keep your energy channels flowing, because wrong action clogs you up like cholesterol in an artery. The Yamas and niyamas are so much more than a social/moral thing, but are the route to svadhyaya- self study- and the beginning of all real magic. Its all exciting. And when I do asana practice now, it feels different still. And if you've read a few of these entries I know it'll seem like I'm always banging on about how 'Whoah my practice is so different now..." but again it is. After the first healing session I had, when I stopped feeling sick and was able to practice again I found my hip flexibility had sort of gone through the roof. Like I can comfortably sit in the splits and read a book comfortable. And when I do Utthita Hasta padangusthasana now it is SO wobbly because the weight is differently distributed to the way it has been for a few years and I'm still trying to get used to it. So, my development remains circular. Its funny that all this is coming to surface in the midst of an intense full time personal training course and mad exercise and studying anatomy every night. I always find when I have less time to myself the quality of time improves. Thats one good thing about full time employment I guess, and why I'm so much happier than 3 months ago when I was starting to feel I was milling around too much...

New Zealand's currently in late autumn. The leaves are crimson and gold and the air is crisp. I love how clean it is here. It was freezing cold for a few days- and the cold here is like a long, damp awful cold. But guess what, the minute I'd had enough of being completely freezing and went out and bought a super warm fluffy cuddly merino jumper to keep me warm, the weather magically transformed back up to t-shirt weather... Its like buying flip flops if you want it to rain. The cold heres unpleasant though, and 20% of Kiwi homes have no insulation whatsoever. Respiratory infections are rife here too, due to damp homes. Still, people continue to be relentlessly good natured and cheerful. I don't think I've met anyone in a bad mood yet. I wonder if they have some kind of special force that weeds out the whingers and frowny faces and sends them to some kind of island where they are forced to watch The Waltons 24/7 until they buckle and surrender to wholesome smiley values... Bus Drivers are lovely, one even drove me home which was not on his route because he didn't want me to walk home in the dark! And then a couple of weeks ago I was going to walk half a kilometre home at night and the bus driver told me that was far too dangerous and made me go and get a taxi... I tried not to smirk as I thought of all the times I've wandered around alone in places far more dangerous than suburban Auckland.... my poor guardian angel doesn't even know what a cigarette break is..............

I love the humour here too, its kind of a rueful, slightly surreal humour, closer to British than American. And the advertising's awesome. My latest favourite TV ad is one for sanitary towels- which is a man, who having been left to his own devices, sticks them all over his head and pretends he's a Storm Trooper.....! Nice! I went to see the film 'Boy' last month too, which is hilarious, set in the '80's, you have to watch it. I've also got quite into local culture. I now watch 'Shortland Street' and 'Gossip Girls' on TV, as well as rediscovering the joys of 'Coronation Street', a big hit over here! I don't know how I find the time! I've made some nice friends on my course too, they're a really nice bunch of people. And I met this lovely girl from Yorkshire too, Emily, in the pub in town and I go for a beer with her from time to time. This weekends been pretty good- I had a job interview yesterday, won't say too much, I'm superstitious but we'll see... I'm going to be in NZ another 6 weeks or so and then where I go next depends on work related stuff but I feel drawn to go West ;) Today is Sunday, my day of rest, I have a mild hangover (I probably should just admit I have no alcohol tolerance anymore) due to drinking vodka with Nadia last night and so I'm going to go watch the Crowe be Robin Hood and get my testosterone fix from the big screen (its thoughtful of God to have fixed it for me to have a good length of time being single, I'm not half so interesting when I have a boyfriend- though I only think about that when I'm hungover) and then go for a lovely walk. Then meditate. Its all about the balance...
Life is sweet...

Posted by victoria8 14:39 Archived in New Zealand Tagged women

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